Reflections: February 18th

It’s hard knowing where to put this blog … so, I think “Snapshots and Project 365” is the best place for it.

[My Project: 365 picture. Remembering Dale]

Today is the 14^th anniversary of Dale Earnhardt’s death. Today would have been my grandma’s 98^th birthday (a grandmother I was named after). She died November 2002, a year and nine months after Dale. So today, there is a bit of sadness. 

Fourteen (14) years ago, she had NO idea who I was. She was in the late stages of Alzheimer’s. So, I decided to watch the race here and there … except for the last few laps. I had a lot to do, and I was a bit emotional. Though nothing like I would be later that night. 

Later that night, as I told my mom goodnight, I learned that Dale Earnhardt had died. He was my racing hero – he made the impossible seem possible.

A lot has changed in those fourteen (14) years. I’ve attended ten (10), going on eleven (11) races at Las Vegas Motorspeedway. Speaking of that ... NASCAR will here in 15 days. I’ll watch Jeff Gordon race one last time here. I’ve seen a lot of my favorite drivers race here one last time, and I’ve seen people race here for the first time. 

I’ve seen the Busch series race, the Nationwide, and soon the Xfinity Series. I’ve seen Nextel and Sprint. I’ve seen a lot of changes in the sport.

But that isn’t all. In the past fourteen (14) years I’ve personally changed in so many ways that I hardly recognize myself. I hardly resemble the young girl (24/25 year old) that heard that devastating announcement. I definitely am nowhere near the same post-9/11 person I was. 

I’ve had extremely low points (9/11 was the “hit rock bottom” part), and I’ve “soared among the clouds” for the high points. 

And, I mean that quite literally. Last June I faced a demon – I flew from my home in Las Vegas to Newark, NJ. One of the hijacked flights flew out of Newark, so that was definitely staring the devil down. I flew in that airport and out of it. I actually boarded a total of four (4) aircraft to take a remarkable journey. 

["D" gate at McCarran International just before boarding my Delta flight to Atlanta Hartsfield-Jackson Airport; first of two for the trip back to New Jersey.]

[A bit delayed leaving Atlanta for Newark due to a patch of bad weather. Checking for flight arrival information. I'd land in time to check in to my hotel. Check-in was 4pm]

[Making the descent into Newark, NJ. Seeing toll booths for the first time. We really weren't that late as it turned out. Both flights were awesome. Scary, but awesome.]

I got to see (from Liberty State Park) the World Trade Center and Statue of Liberty: 

[One of my FAVORITE pictures of the World Trade Center. Taken June 28, 2014]

[My view of the Statue of Liberty. Taken June 28, 2014]

Today, I realize how many blessings I really have. I’ve been able to experience things I never thought possible. Today I realize how much of Dale’s “never give up” spirit is still inspiring me. I’ve met wonderful people, met my childhood heroes, met people who’ve inspired me. I’ve been to some remarkable places and done remarkable things (even gone to concerts):

[Met Gary Sinise at the CSI: Experience. November 2011]

[Attended a Lt. Dan Band concert at the Mandalay Bay. November 2011. One of many "free" free concerts I've been to.]

[Saw the original "Starsky" Ford Gran Torino from Seasons 2-4. Newark, NJ June 26, 2014]

[Met and had dinner with David Soul (Hutch) and Paul Michael Glaser (Starsky). I was part of a select few who did. Newark, NJ June 26-28 2014]

I’ve reconnected with my family, and those bonds are stronger than they were. I’ve reconnected with some friends, lost touch with others, lost some entirely, and made some new friends. But, life goes on. And, I learned the importance of this message:

[Inspirational card I made to remind myself to "keep going". Made through my Heritage Makers business]

I can see why Dale was so tenacious on the track, it is a trait of those born under the Taurus the Bull sign – I know, I was born on the same day. Once I rose up, I never stopped. I kept going. Much like Dale (and like another person I admire and was lucky to meet) … you just keep going. 

Today, I miss Dale. I’m sad; I can’t say I’m not. But, like his son Dale Jr. stated on Twitter … I’m glad he lived:

[Dale Jr's tweet]

I don’t think I’ll ever stop wondering “what if”, but I’m not so bogged down in the “what if”  that I can’t see the “what can be” in front of me.

“I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance

Never settle for the path of least resistance

Livin’ might mean taking chances, but they’re worth takin’

Lovin’ might be a mistake, but it’s worth makin’

Don’t let some hell bent heart leave you bitter

When you come close to sittin’ out, reconsider

Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance …

I hope you dance … ”

That song always seems to play at the right time. Do I cry? Sometimes. But, through those tears, I still smile. Why? Because, I know exactly what give the heavens above more than just a passing glance  really means:

[My view as I head home to Las Vegas from Detroit. Delta Airlines Flight 1917; DTW to LAS; June 2014]

[In case anyone needed to see this to believe it. Yes, I still have all my boarding passes from that trip.]

Changing of the Guard (more specifically – Hello to a New Camera, Goodbye to the Old) …

Okay, this might seem silly … but I’m almost heart-broken over the fact I have to replace my Sony Cybershot (point & shoot) camera.

You might begin laughing, but realize this … I am sad, teary-eyed, and crying. It wasn’t just an ordinary camera – it has been my best friend for the last five years.

** We’ve been through quite a few NASCAR races (2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, and 2014) together    

** We’ve been through several birthdays (2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, and 2014) together 

** We’ve been through several Christmases (2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, and 2014) together 

We’ve been through quite a bit it seems … 

We’ve taken two road trips to California (2011 and 2012), and together we also went on the “trip of a lifetime” to capture memories that I can only share with my photos (and some videos)   

I know … not THAT again!!! But, it is part of the camera’s history. Part of why I am crying. This camera and I made a remarkable history together – we even boarded four (4) airplane rides together. Not as checked baggage, but … in my pocket, on my lap, and looking out the window (something I thought I'd NEVER do).

It was the camera that someone used to capture an epic picture of me and my favorite actor/director (and of course the owner of a Torino used it for another epic picture, check my Twitter avatar for that one). So, it’s a bit hard to pull it out of the purse for the last time to photograph its replacement.   

Now, as we enter into the last NASCAR race mom and I are attending together (though down the road I might go to one by myself) … I’m reminded of how truly special that little pink Cybershot really is. It likely won’t visit this race. Then again its predecessors attended only one (1) or three (3) of the races.

That little one? It did quite a bit of the load! I am not kidding you. It was definitely worth every penny   

I know my mom will take care of it, and I can visit everyday … but, there is something inside that really hurts as I take the last few pictures off of that blasted-ass PRO MEMORY DUO STICK THAT NEVER FIT MY COMPUTER’S PORT!! At least the new camera uses the SD memory card!! 

[The box of the NEW camera. It is a 2012 model though]

 

[Should always get a second battery. I had one with the old camera and was grateful as most of them only last so long. During a NASCAR race? Two batteries are essential. Also, a new memory card was a MUST for this camera. I've previously used FUJI-xD and the Sony Pro-Duo Memory Stick. Now this memory card can fit in my laptop]

[Always cool to explore a new toy. This is a purple/violet one, and the camera uses a USB cable/adapter to charge the batteries]

I initially had a hard time getting the laptop (which is purple too) to read the camera card … arrrgh!!! But, installed a patch and so far, so good.

The new camera has a few cool features:

** 16.2 MEGA PIXELS (I remember getting excited about a 12mp)

** 3” (inch) display

** Touch-screen Menu Display

** Full HD 1080i

** 3D still image and 3D Sweep Panorama mode3

** Intelligent Sweep Panorama HR mode

** Background Defocus

** Face Detection

** Smile Stutter and Anti-Blink

** Natural Flash

And so much more!!

You can read about it here:

http://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B006K5548M/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

While it is a great camera (and comes in the color I LOVE … VIOLET/PURPLE), I can’t help but think of that little pink camera that will sit in a drawer until my mother uses it to practice with.

My mom has NEVER owned a digital camera, and she’s hesitant as she honestly doesn’t know how to use them (wait until she gets a Samsung GS-4 phone in a few weeks; should be fun).

While she’ll care for it lovingly … that pink camera has been part of my life for five (5) years.  I can’t help but feel like I’m abandoning it. Still, I know … in its current condition, retirement is a kind thing for it. It’s been through enough.

[Pink camera has been in a "bad state" for a while. This was late last year -- 2014]

[Here it sits ... waiting for retirement. Picture was taken with new camera]

I just didn’t realize that saying goodbye to a camera was this hard … just wait until I have kids and they go off to college. I can home school them only so far …