Online Safety with Kids and Digital Kidnapping

[Social Media Logos. Image found on Internet]

Back in December 2014, I wrote a blog titled: “Online Privacy and Fake Memories” [http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2014/12/online-privacy-and-fake-memories.html].

It was due to the fact that in December 2014; a friend (L) had called out someone about a photo, supposedly back from the late70’s/early 80’s – which you can read about on the above referenced blog. Turns out the kids photo was STOLEN from a November 2014 blog. Even though the photo was backdated to 2008, on Facebook … anyone can do that with their feature.

A mutual friend (R) stated: “wrong, but not really a big issue to worry about” in regards to the other friend’s concern about the misuse of someone else’s photos.

Unfortunately, as we saw in the case of the kids skiing photo, it didn’t stop there and was not a victimless crime. It never really is; and it isn’t stopping either. As “L” said – there are children involved in this that have no say.  

It’s called “Digital Kidnapping” or “Cyber Kidnapping”. Unfortunately it is a grey (gray) area for law enforcement. Many of the laws on the books haven’t kept up with the technology advances. Nevada just recently passed a specific law on “squatting” (you can either research it or I will talk about it later).

As I stated in the above blog, under an update, this was mentioned on the Today show on 2/27/2015 [http://www.today.com/video/today/57041622#57041622]. It was even mentioned in a news article: http://www.fox8live.com/story/28189979/digital-kidnapping-a-growing-trend

Here is an April 2015 WHNT 19 (Huntsville, AL) news article excerpt:

“A disturbing new trend is spreading across social media. People on social media are stealing photos of other people’s children. It's called "digital kidnapping."

The term "digital kidnapping" may seem embellished to some, but the victims who have pictures of their children stolen are left wondering why someone would do this -- and what else are they capable of?” (Riopka, 2015). You can read more here: “Digital Kidnapping: Madison family finds their child targeted by online photo thief” [http://whnt.com/2015/04/27/digital-kidnapping-madison-family-finds-their-child-targeted-by-online-photo-thief/].

Still not convinced enough?  

Yesterday (May 12^th, 2016), part two of a Dr. Phil episode featured a family confronting the “digital kidnapper”. Warning … it is QUITE disturbing.

Here’s the synopsis:

“Did a Stranger ‘Cyber Hijack’ a Couple’s Twins? A Side-By-Side Photo Comparison.

April and Nathan claim a total stranger has been stealing photos of their 4-year-old daughters and posting them as their own on social media.

In fact, they claim a woman named Ashley has stolen hundreds of photos of the girls since they were born and has reposted them as if she were their own mother.” (link will be at the bottom of the blog).

Scary, isn’t it?

I’ll post links to the Dr. Phil videos. But, I do urge EVERYONE to read my previous blog on it and WATCH the videos that I’ll link to later on.

In another blog … “Social Media and Intellectual Property Theft” [http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2015/01/social-media-and-intellectual-property.html] I stated the following: “Another point that was made was that the person who shared a photo that wasn’t theirs – they weren’t the first or last person to do it, that it is a sign of the times and it won’t change.”

As a friend and I discussed, unless it happens to those kinds of people … they don’t seemingly care. That’s the attitude that is going to keep it going and keep it being “no big deal”.  

There is something emotionally disturbing about people who want to “steal” someone else’s life or kids for an online profile. What’s worse is when they’re confronted … they first continue the lie, perpetuate the lie, then without emotion say “I didn’t mean you any harm” – as if that’s supposed to give the victim the warm, fuzzy feeling. As if the victim is expected to say “oh, you poor thing”.  

In the Dr. Phil case, the digital kidnapper (Ashley) is not really remorseful (her lack of a real apology is apparent) and tries to keep the charade going. She was asked by the real father of the kids (Nathan) to delete the photos some three years ago – Ashley kept going on, even up to April 1^st of this year.

Then, on Dr. Phil, her attitude reflects that she is supposed to be forgiven and “doesn’t know why” she printed the photos and continued the charade. Watch the videos.

If you (the reader) want to know how serious this is (and can be), picture this scenario … if you will:

Doris is a lovely, but lonely 56 year old lady. But, very lonely. She (in order to combat the loneliness) makes up a story (after seeing a happy couple with two kids) that she has custody of her two grandkids because their parents died in a car crash.

She shares pictures of her two grandkids (Janie and James) online and talks about them constantly. As to why she isn’t in the picture with them? She says “oh, I don’t take pictures of myself, they’re far more important to me after everything they’ve been through”.

Her online friend Mary sees Janie and James with another couple (at Disneyland). Mary calls the cops because Doris is their grandma and their parents died … so this couple must’ve kidnapped them, right? What is this couple doing with Doris’ grandkids? She didn’t say anything about the trip. After all the kids have been through, why would Doris not take them herself?

Well … what if Doris has been lying? What if she, like Ashley did, digitally kidnapped Janie and James by stealing pictures from their parents’ social media pages and reposted them as her grandkids?

And, what would happen to Doris, Mary, the parents, and the kids when this is uncovered?

See what kind of trouble that can cause? Any wonder that back in December 2014 I posted two blogs on the seriousness of this?

Now, some might argue that perhaps Doris’ family might speak out. What if she has no family to speak of, or is using an alias herself? How would we really know?

Here’s the set of videos from the Dr. Phil episodes. They are in order according to the website and “article”.

PART ONE: “I Believe A Stranger Is Obsessed With My Beautiful Twin Daughters and Has ‘Cyber Hijacked’ Them!” [http://www.drphil.com/shows/i-believe-a-stranger-is-obsessed-with-my-beautiful-twin-daughters-and-has-cyber-hijacked-them/; May 11, 2016]:

“Mother Accuses Stranger Of ‘Digitally Kidnapping’ Her 4-Year-Old Twin Daughters”

http://www.drphil.com/videos/mother-accuses-stranger-of-digitally-kidnapping-her-4-year-old-twin-daughters/

 “Did a Stranger ‘Cyber Hijack’ A Couple’s Twins? A Side-By-Side Photo Comparison”

http://www.drphil.com/videos/did-a-stranger-cyber-hijack-a-couples-twins-a-side-by-side-photo-comparison/

“Woman Responds To Allegations She Digitally Stole Photos Of Couple’s Twins & Posted Them As If They Were Her Own Children”

http://www.drphil.com/videos/woman-responds-to-allegations-she-digitally-stole-photos-of-couples-twins-posted-them-as-if-they-were-her-own-children/

“Parents Confront Woman Accused Of ‘Cyber Hijacking’ Their 4-Year-Old Twins”

http://www.drphil.com/videos/parents-confront-woman-accused-of-cyber-hijacking-their-4-year-old-twins/

PART TWO: “Will Ashley Confess”

“Parents Question How Framed Photos Of Their Daughters Wound Up In Stranger’s Home”

http://www.drphil.com/videos/parents-question-how-framed-photos-of-their-daughters-wound-up-in-strangers-home/

“Woman Apologizes For ‘Digitally Kidnapping’ Couple’s Twin Girls: ‘I Really Don’t Mean You Guys Any Harm’”

http://www.drphil.com/videos/woman-apologizes-for-digitally-kidnapping-couples-twin-girls-i-really-dont-mean-you-guys-any-harm/

 “How a Woman Used Social Media And Her Deceased Mother To Perpetuate A Story About Having Twins”

http://www.drphil.com/videos/how-a-woman-used-social-media-and-her-deceased-mother-to-perpetuate-a-story-about-having-twins/

I apologize if this blog is almost like a newspaper (or magazine) to read. I urge everyone to watch the videos above and follow basic steps for protecting one’s family. What do I do?

1.) I don’t allow many people access to my account. Not because I don’t have several requests – I don’t know some of these people. I am not going for a “most friends of all time” award. I want to know and interact with REAL people. If they’re not someone I know (either we have a mutual friend; I’ve really met them; or I can vet them) – I say “NO” to that friend request.

2.) I am not comfortable allowing people to know where I live – after all, I don’t know some of these people. I keep my Facebook LOCKED down by posting all “sensitive” stuff to only those who have my address or who I’d let know where I live (family, close friends).

3.) I am not about to let strangers know when I am not going to be at home. So, I keep that only for family (cousins, uncle, and my mom) and a few friends (who are just as close as my family). That’s who I’m going to also show my vacation posts to and pictures of my kids to. It also cuts down on potential suspects.

4.) Watermark photos with something. Keep the originals in a safe place other than a computer (flash drive works well and if you can on DVD, holds more than a CD). Try to be accurate with the file dates.

5.) Watch out for groups on Facebook. Predators can lurk here – which is obviously what happened to the Willis family.

6.) Never refer to kids by full name in a public post. Use Twin/Triplet #1; Daughter #1; DD (dear daughter) #1; kid#1 (if family has multiple boys and girls). Things like that. Also don’t reveal real birthdays.

7.) Watch the frequency and type of postings.

I said the following in another blog, but true here …

8.) Don’t be available in search on Facebook

9.) Set “friend requests” to “Friends of Friends”

10.) Maintain the strictest possible privacy on Facebook and Twitter

          A.) Don’t be afraid to have lists on Facebook

          B.) Don’t be afraid to de-friend or block on Facebook

          C.) Don’t be afraid to contact authorities either

          D.) Don’t be afraid to have one public Twitter and one “family only” account. FYI: I think Twitter needs to have a family only list or option.

11.) If anything seems suspicious – REPORT IT IMMEDIATELY!!! Don’t forget to do your homework, take screenshots, keep emails.

As I said in a previous blog:

“Just because something has been done (and repeatedly) doesn’t mean we should allow it to continue. We can take precautions by limiting what we do online to impact that privacy. We can make reports against people as well.

I don’t think we can stop it entirely, but there is nothing wrong with being vigilant about it and educating our friends to being a bit more cautious online.”

But, we should encourage legislators to pass stricter laws and penalties. Laws are useless without enforcement.

I do urge people to exercise as much caution as possible. And, as I also said:

This is not just a "minor" matter. This crime has a name. And, there are victims. And, those victims may be too young to speak for themselves.  

Hiding on Twitter … Private vs Public Profiles

[Various Social Media Logos]

How I’d LOVE to hide on Twitter.

Before you ask why (or what) … I’ll ask (and answer):

“What does this have to do with snapshots or Project: 365” … quite a bit if you’ve read the last few blogs:

Unwanted Attention – Privacy, Special Photos, and Social Media

[http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2015/01/unwanted-attention-privacy-special.html]

That’s where I presented the pitfalls of having a profile picture of myself and an actor and how it led to a bit of a misunderstanding with me and another one of his fans. She was a French speaking fan, and I had to use Google Translate, and a slight language barrier.  

While it turned out with a positive ending (she blocked me when I replied to her in response to her messages to me), it was a wake-up call.  

Project: 365 – Privacy and Social Media

[http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2015/01/project-365-privacy-and-social-media.html]

This blog is where I stated why I preferred using Facebook over Twitter to share pictures on – highlighting the privacy settings of Facebook, and how I may not continue the project on Twitter in light of certain events related to “photo stealing”.

Social Media and Intellectual Property Theft

[http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2015/01/social-media-and-intellectual-property.html]

This is where I discussed the severity of something that happened in December 2014, and why it was a bigger issue than some people thought.

In this research, it led me to an incident in New Mexico where a woman is suing artist Anne Taintor for using an old high school photograph with a snarky message on a flask.

One of the many articles I referenced:

“NM woman sues over yearbook photo, novelty flask”

[http://www.koat.com/news/nm-woman-sues-over-yearbook-photo-novelty-flask/30548270]

And, how we can set about changing the “sign of the times … this will never change” mindset by awareness, education, vigilance, and privacy.

Finally … the one that started it:

Online Privacy and Fake Memories

[http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2014/12/online-privacy-and-fake-memories.html]

This is where I discussed how the discovery of a modern digital photo was used to represent kids from “long ago” (circa 1970’s) and one of the people mentioned in it commented on it to perpetuate the “fake profile” theory.

However, the blog highlighted bigger problems than someone using it to validate another fake profile.

I mentioned how a friend’s Facebook post about the photo highlighted the complacency a few friends took with regard to online safety and being aware that some people are not at all who they seem.

In addition, it highlighted the need for perhaps making profiles more private, and watching what we share and WHO we share that information with.

This is where this blog is heading … 

I never give out personal information to people I don’t know. I certainly don’t post my address online, my telephone numbers, my email addresses. I try not to show too many family photos (unless the family is deceased) on Twitter. I try to keep it for public use – things I don’t mind letting out because they might come out any way or would be out as a result of being in a public place such as a theme park, racetrack, mall, etc.

My primary profile is on there to interact on a personal level with friends and some businesses, etc. With businesses I share good experiences, compliment service, and sometimes complaints.

I do have a secondary account which is a business account. I haven’t been using too much here lately. I’m hoping to begin focusing on that in the near future.

I save Facebook for family and VERY close friends – sometimes it is family only depending on the content I am sharing.  

On Facebook and Twitter … I also like to post my “picture of the day” or rather “Project: 365” photo.

Given what I learned in December, I’m hesitant about sharing my photos on Twitter. On Facebook, I have greater privacy controls for the reasons stated here and in the blogs too.

With Twitter my profile choices are either:

PRIVATE

PUBLIC

I’d like to be to select the “PRIVATE” option as Twitter doesn’t have detailed options, nor a “share direct” feature like Instagram does.

 I run into certain problems if I choose a “PRIVATE” profile:

1.) Unless people are following me, there’s a good chance they won’t see my tweets if I were to tweet a reply to them or a general “hi, great service” kind of tweet

2.) I can’t interact for the purposes of giveaways (yes, I enjoy those)

3.) People who want to follow are often turned off by the “PRIVATE, PROTECTED TWEETS” status– I’ve been blocked as well during the short time I had a “PRIVATE” account – the only reason? PRIVATE account.

Some celebrities have even taken issue with those who have “PRIVATE PROFILES” when you follow them. This I know firsthand from reading a particular celebrity’s tweets, and no I am not going to name them. They, like most of us, have their reasons.

As I stated in one of the blogs …

“that doesn’t sit well with some potential followers, even famous people. Some have openly expressed the fact they feel that by asking to follow someone on Twitter it is an audition of sorts and one stated “why be private if you’re going to be online”. They feel you have something to hide …”

Of course I have something to hide (like others) – but not for the wrong reasons.

Some people are “PRIVATE” on Twitter because:

1.) Perhaps they don’t want to share their life or memories for someone else to steal them (as what I have shown in previous blogs and mentioned here)

2.) Maybe they have a stalker (or someone who is bullying them) and don’t want them to know where they live or what is going on. After all, they shouldn’t have to give up living their life in order to accommodate a stalker or bully, that’d be re-victimizing them over and over.

3.) Perhaps it is a military family member who is keeping in contact with their family/friends back home; or the other way around (OpSec and all)

4.) It might be a teen’s account and being private is part of an agreement between parent and child in order to have the account – usually the account is for interaction with long-distance family and friends; family-friendly accounts/content; etc.

With that said, celebrities should know #2 more than anyone. They can always elect to block the “private” person or simply ask “why do you have a private profile” before blocking. I’d have no problem explaining why, as most honest people likely would. It is their choice overall – just something to consider.

They should also understand #3 as well – after all the good guys aren’t the only ones who use Twitter or social media. Don’t we all know about “loose lips sink ships” – Operational Security (OpSec)?

Number four (4) could be viewed as responsible parenting and responsible use of social media. It should be applauded as a way to keep kids safe while learning about the “online world”.

Personally, I would like a feature that Facebook offers: being able to create lists of who to post what content to. That’d make Twitter better and safer as well. But, I get the point. Some people are just leery of those who want to be private. I get it, but there are cases as to why private profiles exist. 

As I also said in my other blogs, I get that each social network wants to be different (it’s why some users favor one over the other). When it comes to privacy, that’s where you can’t have just two choices, it’s not feasible. Even Google + (G+) has “circles” you could create to post specific content to – if the person wasn’t in the circle, they didn’t see the content.

In an age where we’re trying to be so connected, we end up connecting with the wrong people. In some respect we’re all bullied near daily – whether it be on a Facebook post about our reaction to a devastating and somewhat personal event, or something we might feel strongly about … each day someone will get bullied. Privacy settings help us stay connected to those we want to and stay away from those we don’t. They are essential to controlling the way we interact and protect ourselves – even how we protect our family.

Facebook has greater privacy control than Twitter.  Even Instagram has better privacy control options (at least on the phone app).

For our safety, we’re told to lock down our social media, but yet we’re ostracized for doing so or made to feel bad for doing so. As an adult, that is confusing. To a child? I can’t even imagine where their level of confusion would be with “lock down your social media, what are you hiding for, why are you being private while online?” I’m confused. But, I’ve read it. On one hand people tell you to watch what you post on social media, but they ask why you’re being so secretive.

That makes NO sense to me. Those who know me will tell you – I’m pretty darn smart (even my college transcripts indicate that), and I catch on quickly.

I’ve had protected accounts follow me; usually there isn’t a problem when I ask to follow them. Most people approve it within 24 hours. If I send a request and they accept, fine it’s all good. After all, I can always block them if I don’t like their content. If they don’t approve my request in a timely manner, I will block them – haven’t had to do that too often though.

Here’s how I look at it on Twitter … unless you’re comfortable with me following you back, don’t follow me. I don’t mind asking to follow someone with protected tweets. It isn’t an audition – it is in most cases for their safety and security – and I respect that – just as I would expect my privacy, safety, and security respected as well.  

So, the next time someone asks any of those questions on Twitter (“why do you have a private profile”, etc.) … I might just direct them to this blog as it’d take far too many tweets to explain it.

And, when someone suggests I protect my tweets, I’ll also direct them here – sometimes it isn’t as easy to explain as it seems.  

Unwanted Attention – Privacy, Special Photos, and Social Media

Lately it seems that a lot of “social media” stuff is inspiring my blogs – particularly the photography ones. That I apologize for. I’d hoped to be talking about fun stuff – and I’m going to try to get back to that as soon as I address a few issues.

These are things that have happened to me over the last several months (some days apart) and some I’ve been part of. But, I’d like to let people know what’s been going on.

This latest incident started off on January 3^rd with a Facebook message to me … in French.

First of all, my name maybe French (and I am of French descent with a mix of several other things – Native American, English, etc), but I am an American. My mom’s family roots go back to the Revolutionary War. I also only speak English (or American as I call it). So, needless to say, I was perplexed as to what was going on and what this woman was trying to ask – in addition – why was she trying to ask it of me?

This was not someone I know, but obviously was a fan of the same actor I am a fan of, one that I recently met as well.

Apparently, because I had made a comment on one of the actor’s Facebook posts (and who hasn’t), and because my profile picture is that of me and said actor … this “fan” messaged me.

As of note … I am not the only person to comment on a celebrity’s Facebook page/post or tweet a celebrity – though I don’t do it very often. Usually it is a “thank you” or compliment on an episode of their series (mainly I interact with them on Twitter).

Many people do it and some celebs love interacting with their fans (at least the respectful and polite fans). Dale Earnhardt Jr. and other NASCAR celebrities often do impromptu “Q & A” (question & answer) sessions with the fans.

After all, they wouldn’t post a “what do you think”, “what kind of questions do you have”, or post if they didn’t want comments or the interaction. 

I am also not the only person who has used a picture of themselves with their favorite personality as a profile picture – scour Facebook or Twitter, and you will see it. I know of a few friends who have their profile photos set to that of them with their favorite celebrity. It’s nothing new. And, they have been doing it for years. There is nothing dishonest about it, so long as you are not pretending to be officially associated with that celebrity; i.e: wife, significant other, sibling, etc.

With that said …

I looked at the message and was like: “what is this, how do I reply”.

As it turned out she obviously thought my personal page was the actor’s page (perhaps she thought it was his personal page). Why I have no idea, as he has his own “professional” page; mine is “personal” with my real name. She was apparently telling me how much she loved the actor (thinking I was the person) and things of that nature. Things she’d expressed in numerous (at least 4-5) comments to the actor on the same post I’d commented ONCE on.

I wanted to reply to tell her that I didn’t know what she was saying and obviously I had no official connection to the celebrity (rather than misled her into thinking so). So, I took to Google translate to find out what it was she’d said to me.

I politely told her that I was not connected to the actor and that I was just a fan who’d been lucky enough to meet him over the summer, and that was where my profile picture originated. I explained that I used Google to translate and apologized. Simple, done. I thought that would end it.

It didn’t.

The next morning (January 4^th), I got another message from the person. That one I didn’t even know what she was asking. It translated to “you find out how”. Maybe she was wondering why I was replying to her, forgetting she had sent me the message the day before (hey, it could happen; only thing I have to think of). 

Not knowing French (or another language) is a barrier to politely solving the issue. When you don’t know what someone is asking, you don’t know how to reply without risking an insult.

And, you also don’t want to risk agitating the person either (not knowing if it is an innocent inquiry or a sinister investment).

Again, as politely as I could … I told her I didn’t know what she was asking/saying; that I wasn’t officially connected to the actor; and apologized for the confusion. I hoped that would end it. I know she (or someone on the account) saw the reply 4-5 minutes after I posted it. I was hoping that would definitely be the end of it.

As with most things of this nature, I got to thinking … and that wasn’t good in this case, or in any case.

That picture that people treasure of themselves and their favorite celebrity/person (actor, NASCAR driver, musician, etc) might attract unwanted attention from others – especially when used as a profile photo.

While it is a treasured photo, and definitely one to be proud of, it paves the way for this kind of attention/interaction. Some of that might be innocent and some not so innocent.

When I first planned this blog out I had no idea what her motives were and was prepared to “block” if necessary. I am of course no stranger to blocking people. I’ve had to for various reasons.

On the early morning of January 6^th I checked to make sure she hadn’t replied to me. I noticed “You cannot reply to this conversation” at the bottom of the message thread. 

I was filled with more relief than shock.

Apparently she blocked me almost two days after my reply to her. So, that ended quite well – which is good. This is a story with a positive ending and for that I am quite relieved. At least I don’t have to worry what her motives are or worry about any future contact from her.

This is not a new issue, at least not for me.

It started not long after my trip when there was an incident about the cover photo I chose for my “Twitter” cover. Turns out it was a misunderstanding as the person had no idea it was a replica license plate of a car from one of my favorite TV shows. That I wrote about in another blog:

 “How a Photo & Memory Led to a Twitter Hiatus” [http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2014/08/how-photo-memory-led-to-twitter-hiatus.html]

[Seemingly innocent photo I took in June 2014 in New Jersey. Set off a series of events that almost led to me leaving Twitter]

This most recent incident is going to make me hesitate when choosing a particular profile/avatar photo to represent myself on social media accounts. I’m also going to hesitate on “Project: 365” when it comes to posting on Twitter. As I’m sure some people would hesitate (about the profile photo that is).

When using one of yourself, you identify as a real person and are more credible to others. You’re a real person (well, when you use a real photo of yourself that is).

When you have one of yourself with someone famous you met – there are some bragging rights and pride, not to mention it is a memorable event that you want to share with family and friends.

But, you also run the risk of unwanted attention – such as this message from a “fan”. That may not be a good thing in the long run, depending on their motives.

If you use a “generic” photo it gives you some privacy and anonymity, though you risk being labeled as a phony or fake; even in some cases a stalker.

There’s really no winning in this one.

This person who I’ll refer to as “Elin” – is using a generic photo on their account. And, this is not their only Facebook account – they have another one (that they are friends with) under the same name (again, with a generic picture).

That was another concern about her interaction with me – the anonymity, and after some of the things I and a friend have been through over the last few years – it is creepy.

Thankfully (and I am hoping) this was a misunderstanding.

But, there is a lesson here:

Watch the profile pictures and be careful. You can inadvertently attract the wrong kind of attention. I got lucky in my case and this time.

The “attention” was something I hadn’t even considered when choosing the photo for my profile over six (6) months ago.

As of note, my profile picture on Twitter is my normal Facebook cover photo:

[This is the REAL me sitting in a replica of a famous TV series car. This was taken in New Jersey in June 2014]

I’ve been lucky with that profile photo … so far. 

Project: 365 – Privacy and Social Media

[Photo I took at a park close to where I live in Nevada]

Last year, before Christmas … this happened: (if you haven’t read that blog … please, do so now) …

“Online Privacy and Fake Memories” [http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2014/12/online-privacy-and-fake-memories.html]

To keep this introduction rather short, that blog was about a friend (“Li”) discovering that a friend of hers was lying. It started as a lie about Li’s friend being sick and culminated with the discovery of multiple accounts used to perpetuate the scam.

A picture was shared on one of the “fake” profiles and was supposed to be that of three children in obviously around 1976-1980 (given the birthdates of the people connected). One of the problems was that the photo was apparently stolen from a parent’s blog. I later found another picture of those same three kids, however posing with their parents (I am assuming). And, the kids were in those same clothes from the kids of “long ago”. That information is at the bottom of that blog.

It was that “photo stealing” incident that made me realize that sharing even a seemingly innocent picture online can soon become someone else’s memories, as the previous blog talks about. It can become someone else’s story, history, and life.

It makes people (like me) hesitant to share those precious memories – even if it’s a visit at a theme park that millions visit. I know for certain I wouldn’t want people using pictures of my family (or myself) to represent their “fake” family or themselves. I wouldn’t want someone else sharing my “great vacation” as theirs.

Sorry, but I find that just CREEPY! I wonder if someone else is using my pictures and I’m their daughter, wife, sister … or them. Yes, you can almost scare yourself into insomnia.

As a result of the incident in December, I concluded 2014’s “Project: 365”on Twitter on December 31^st. And, I am a bit concerned about sharing “2015” on there. Even sharing my NASCAR photos or Bellagio Conservatory photos is “iffy” – especially considering that some don’t feel that it is a “big issue”.

As far as “personal” photos (me, my family, or people I’m with …) – I’m extremely leery, if not terrified to share them on Twitter where there are only two options for tweets:

PUBLIC

PROTECTED

While people might say “protect your tweets”, that doesn’t sit well with some potential followers, even famous people. Some have openly expressed the fact they feel that by asking to follow someone it’s an audition of sorts and one stated “why be private if you’re going to be online”. They feel you have something to hide. That is something I’ll address in another blog …

Anyway …

I started the 2015 edition of “Project: 365” on Facebook where I have greater control and privacy settings. Despite all the fun people want to poke at Facebook, it allows greater privacy for photos and posts – and that is something I am looking for.

I have created lists of people I “allow” to view my photos and certain posts. I can select just family, close friends, or everyone. I can mix and match per post or album. That is a better control than what Twitter gives me. I can have my connections without losing my privacy.

In light of all this stuff, I’d like to suggest that Twitter get on that bandwagon – and fast. Let us create lists of followers we want to broadcast to while still maintaining a public profile.

While each social network wants to be different – sometimes it isn’t always possible. Nor is it a good idea.

For right now, I’m going to take a “one day at a time” approach when it comes to sharing photos on Twitter. I might only post “non-descript” photos such as a movie DVD, ticket stub, flower, etc … and skip days with “personal” photos. I’m still undecided, however, I will continue to “watermark” my photos though. And, it is something I highly recommend.

The reason I started “water-marking” photos was because of a friend who shared a picture I’d taken before asking me if it was okay to do so. Memes and those images, I get sharing without permission – especially when they’re shared by public accounts or companies for that purpose.

This particular photo in question was one I’d taken of something I’d seen at a grocery store. It was one of my own photos – my own intellectual property, after all since I photographed it – I owned the copyright to it.

The photo was shared before I even got home – without asking permission, without a comment, without attribution to me. This friend went and shared it. They never apologized, but I have since taken corrective actions to ensure it doesn’t happen again. And, that is why I prefer Facebook when sharing photos – I have those privacy options to choose from.

I am leery about continuing to share my work. It’s not that I don’t want to share, but I want to do so responsibly and safely. I also want to keep my work as mine.

I also don’t want to be on a flask for someone else’s monetary gain either.

And, I’d recommend reading another blog here (where that is mentioned):

“Social Media and Intellectual Property Theft” [http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2015/01/social-media-and-intellectual-property.html]

Social Media and Intellectual Property Theft

In response to an incident on Facebook, I wrote the following blog: “Online Privacy and Fake Memories” [http://snapshotsandproject365.blogspot.com/2014/12/online-privacy-and-fake-memories.html]. I highlighted the issue of fake memories stolen from people.

There was someone who thought it might have been deceptive, and it was “wrong, but not really a big issue to worry about”. Being deceptive is not a “big issue”? I find that a little hard to believe, especially when there are people who believe everything they read/see/hear online.

Another point that was made was that the person who shared a photo that wasn’t theirs – they weren’t the first or last person to do it, that it is a sign of the times and it won’t change.

That’s the kind of attitude and complacency that causes it to continue. It’s been excused so people keep excusing it; they’re so used to it happening it is second nature.

A recent case in the news (that’ll I get to later) highlights the lack of concern we have for this issue when it comes to intellectual property as well as our rights as people.

There is a HUGE concern when someone feels a deep need to swipe someone else’s photos, memories, or even a “life” to represent as their own – deceptive is not quite adequate – it is FRAUD. It amounts to virtual identity theft. Even if it isn’t for monetary gain – who is to say it wouldn’t lead there? [More on that later]

The person commenting (about it not being a big issue) was only concerned if it was being used for pedophilia purposes. As long as it wasn’t? “Being in the nature it was used … it was wrong, but not really a big issue”.

How about the fact that the people doing this are stealing someone’s family to represent themselves and becoming a voice for that family? That should worry anyone that someone else is being their voice.

“Joanna” (the person who was mentioned in the blog “Online Privacy and Fake Memories”) was using a picture (that she likely did not own or have permission to use) to represent herself, a twin brother, and this Lisa “long ago”.  And, this “Lisa” perpetuated the scam by commenting on the photo.

Being deceptive and dishonest puts the entire online community at risk – in addition, it is PLAGARISIM. They are STEALING someone else’s work and using it (even if it isn’t for monetary gain) as their own.

To be blunt … it is against the law. It is called INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY THEFT. And, it is something the FBI takes seriously.

If you were to publicly screen your own DVD copy of a movie that you bought – even if it isn’t for monetary gain (without permission of the distributor) – it’s still considered illegal. Read this warning (it’s from a WARNER DVD) …

[Picture of FBI warning – taken by me]

And one from a CBS/Paramount DVD: 

[Again, taken by me]

Intellectual property theft isn’t as “small” as some like to believe.

When someone (like myself) takes PERSONAL photographs, we are the “copyright” holder – despite the fact it might be a “public” place (Disneyland, etc). That is our work; that is our intellectual property. The images belong to us. They are for our use and distribution – no one else has the right to distribute them without payment and/or attribution use – even then the copyright holder might still retain their rights.

This is a good read:

“FBI Anti-Piracy Warning Seal” – note that it is under the section “Intellectual Property Theft”

http://www.fbi.gov/about-us/investigate/white_collar/ipr/anti-piracy

Notice: “Copyrighted works can include, but are not limited to, films, audio recordings, electronic media, software, books, photographs, etc.” … I did. And, it is not a “victimless” crime. Even if it is not for monetary gain, there are victims involved.

Sounds serious, doesn’t it? Remember the person who said “wrong, but not really a big issue to worry about” … they’re wrong. And, they’re wrong in a big way.

To answer the person who said “sadly a sign of the times … this will never change” …

Yes it is a sign of the times, but it can change and you can do something about it – be more private. Watch what you share with and the people you share to.

Depending on what network you use and why you use it:

1.) Don’t be available in search (Facebook)

2.) Set “friend requests” to “Friends of Friends” (Facebook)

3.) Watch how many family photos you post and what details

          (Facebook & Twitter)

4.) Maintain the strictest possible privacy (Facebook & Twitter)

                    A.) Don’t be afraid to have lists on Facebook

                    B.) Don’t be afraid to de-friend or block on Facebook

5.) Watch who you friend (Facebook)

6.) Lightly watermark your photos (Facebook & Twitter)

7.) If anything seems suspicious – REPORT IT

          (Facebook & Twitter)

Just because something has been done (and repeatedly) doesn’t mean we should allow it to continue. We can take precautions by limiting what we do online to impact that privacy. We can make reports against people as well.

I don’t think we can stop it entirely, but there is nothing wrong with being vigilant about it and educating our friends to being a bit more cautious online.

Oh, and if my blogs aren’t convincing … remember I said something about a recent case in the news highlighting the lack of concern we have for the issue?

How about this:

“N.M. woman sues over yearbook photo being used on novelty flask”

[http://www.jrn.com/ktnv/now-trending/NM-woman-sues-over-yearbook-photo-being-used-on-novelty-flask-287828651.html]

Three more links:

“New Mexico woman sues novelty company for putting her high school portrait on flask”

[http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/n-m-woman-sues-company-putting-photo-flask-article-1.2067066]

“NM woman sues over yearbook photo, novelty flask”

[http://www.koat.com/news/nm-woman-sues-over-yearbook-photo-novelty-flask/30548270]

“Woman suing over use of her photo on flask”

[http://krqe.com/2015/01/05/woman-suing-over-use-of-her-photo-on-flask/]

Just because it has happened, doesn’t mean we continue to let it happen.

“Dunn said his office tried to get the issue resolved before filing the lawsuit, without success.

“I received an email from Anne Taintor at one point when we first started talking that basically said ‘well, most people find this stuff funny – get over it.'” Dunn called the company’s response, “a really flippant way to think about somebody’s reputation.””

I think Mr. Dunn says it better than I can. 

Online Privacy and Fake Memories

NEW UPDATES: Please scroll to the bottom to read the updates!! Something similar was mentioned on the Today show on 2/27/2015.

We often don’t think about it when we post a photo online via Facebook or Twitter that someone will come along and snatch it and use it as their own.

Sick? Absolutely. My mom said it was frightening. She even asked “what is wrong with those people”.

She’s right. It is. But, it is very real and I’ve seen it with my own eyes. As far as what is wrong with them … that is anyone’s guess and only a medical professional’s opinion.

How’d we get on to the subject?

I was talking with a friend Sunday night (12/21) when she questioned the “validity” of a photo. Basically “Joanna” was claiming that the photo was of herself, a twin (Janne), and a friend taken “a long time ago”. [As of note, the “Joanna” account no longer exists on Facebook, so that says something right there – though perhaps the privacy was locked down].

The problem? These people are in their 40’s (born in 1970). So, the photo would HAVE to be about 30-35 years old (1979-1984).

Here’s the screen-cap:

[While it is dated December 17, 2008 ... that can be backdated. I know, I've done it on Facebook for photo albums]

Frightening? Absolutely. It should be.

To make it more terrifying, the apparent “friend” [Lisa] comments that she remembers it ... which you can read here:

[Long long time ago? As in when? 2008 or 2014?]

While that’d be okay … the photo was taken from a November 2014 blog:

“Stay Safe on the Slopes – Safety Tips for Families” [http://kidproject.org/2014/11/26/stay-safe-slopes-safety-tips-families/]

[Listing from the main BLOG page of the website]

[Full size photo. Can find it here: http://kidproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/IMG_6331-640x523.jpg]

Scared now?

Sorry, but I am hoping you are. Actually, I’m hoping you’re TERRIFIED. This is THAT serious! 

I’m sure this mom would be terrified that her children are being “used” like this – that someone (Joanna) is claiming to be her children, only a “long time ago”, and that another person (Lisa) remembers that memory. I’m sorry, but that is terrifying.

But, you wonder … if it happened to her … could it happen to you? Is someone using your children as their own, maybe as their younger selves? Maybe they’re using your memories as theirs.

That reminds me of a movie … remember “One Hour Photo”? It was one of Robin Williams’ movies were he deviates from his normal comedic side.

Here’s a synopsis from IMDB:

“His favorite customers are the Yorkin family, made up of husband Will (Michael Vartan), wife Nina (Connie Nielsen), and their son, Jake (Dylan Smith). He has done their photos for years and, over time, has developed an obsession with the family; he idolizes their happiness and affluence, memorizes every personal detail about them that he can learn, and finally begins to stalk them. Sy secretly makes his own copies of the Yorkins' photos from the film negatives and then puts them on a wall in his apartment, a massive collage which has accumulated to over 600 in count. Most of all, he fantasizes about being a member of their family and sharing in the love he assumes they must feel.”

[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0265459/synopsis?ref_=tt_stry_pl]

That (and this newest incident) has me thinking about all those photos I share on Twitter with my “Project: 365” and other “memories”.

Who else is using those? Thankfully I don’t have a family that I put up there (kids, husband, parents, etc). And, as far as Facebook? That is locked down. Only specific people that I know and trust can see my photos. There are some people I personally know (friends) that I don’t let see certain things. But, it is cause for concern.

I’d like to warn this mom … give her “Lisa’s” information and let her report it to Facebook. But, I also don’t want to invade the mom’s privacy or sound like a creeper. I mean how would it sound?

However, the reason I decided to mention this is that some of my friends “friend” a lot of people on Facebook, publicize their Instagram accounts, and even post on Twitter. These people have their kids’ names listed, where they go to school, and sometimes their schedules. Again, that movie comes to mind.

I’m wondering how many people might have stolen those precious memories and are using them in a Facebook account talking about their “kids”.

My friend and I were talking about this while I was watching the prequels of “Star Wars”. As I sat there watching the movie, crocheting, and spending time with my mom ... I thought about who might have saved my pictures and used them to make up their own memories or moments.  Whose daughter am I? Whose mother is she? It can be frightening. It definitely makes you want to reconsider uploading that cute photo of the kids.

That was another reason I felt compelled to write this … it could happen to any one of us. And, the sad thing? “Lisa” never addressed the issue of why that picture from supposedly a “long time ago” featured someone’s real kids from a November 2014 blog.

If my blog accomplishes anything I hope you {the reader} take stock of what you post and your security settings. And, also watch who you friend. While I’ll admit, I friend some people I haven’t met, I’ve also gotten to know them through people I have … and their stories check out.

As with anything – be cautious. Don’t be afraid to set up “lists” on Facebook and group people accordingly. Watch what you put out there. And, if it seems strange, yes question it – PLEASE! There are some sick people out there. They don’t always advertise.

If you’re not sure, ask a friend’s advice. The worst thing you’ll end up doing is losing someone who likely should be lost. The best thing? You’ll keep your family’s memories to yourselves not to mention your safety.

As far as me? I’m wondering if I want to keep sharing pictures on Twitter …

UPDATE [1:50pm PST]:

After writing this blog nine (9) hours ago (and half-asleep), someone commented on a Facebook post that perhaps the individual who did this might be mentally ill. All the more reason in exercising caution when posting online and who you share to.

And, all the more reason to “warn” people against friending the person or persons in the photos. After all, as friends shouldn’t we look out for each other? Especially this time of year?

Although the “commenter” didn’t see anything wrong with it and pointed out that it wasn’t like it was a pedophile deal. True it wasn’t.

I will agree to a point ...

But, as I and someone else pointed out – you can’t say for 100% that the person isn’t trying to lure people in with a sad tale. And, you can’t say for 100% that they aren’t a child predator.

Why?

Some things start off innocent. And, when something BAD happens we say “OH NO! I saw that! I knew something was wrong/off. I knew it, I felt it. I had this nagging feeling …”

I’d rather be overly cautious than be a victim. There is NOTHING wrong with exercising caution nor warning people to take a bit more caution. The worst that happens is that we’re wrong.

But, when it starts off with a lie … I don’t think it is going to get better.

Again, just my thoughts on that. As for me? I’m going to tighten my security a bit better.

Another thought I will leave with everyone – IDENTITY THEFT. If that isn’t a cause for concern, I don’t know what is. 

Now, to get Twitter to have that nifty little “list” feature.

UPDATE: January 4, 2015

I just wanted to update this blog to say that I did more research on that “photo” …

Here is another link where this blog was featured:

“5 Safety Tips For Families On the Slopes”

[http://blog.snowbasin.com/2014/02/5-safety-tips-for-families-on-the-slopes]

Here is another “photo” with those kids … (supposedly this “Lisa” with Janne and Joanna) … 

And, the direct photo link :

http://blog.snowbasin.com/wp-content/uploads/G0092007-001.jpg

It bears repeating that that is in NO way a “long, long ago” picture. I’d venture a guess that it was in 2014. Definitely not in the 1970’s.

I am also writing a follow up blog as to my future of “Project: 365” on Twitter. 


UPDATE: 2/27/2015 ...

I had to take my car in for service and was waiting on paperwork for a loaner. I heard about "DIGITAL KIDNAPPING" on the TV. Here is the video from the TODAY show: 

http://www.today.com/video/today/57041622

Here is also an article about it: 

http://www.fox8live.com/story/28189979/digital-kidnapping-a-growing-trend

I urge everyone to read this blog, share it, and get educated!! This is not just a "minor" matter. This crime has a name. I hope the person who once commented  “wrong, but not really a big issue to worry about” ... can now see this is a crime, it has a name, and there are victims.